1 Peter 3:1-6
Building A Solid Marriage
Part 7 - Portrait of a Godly Wife
Intro:
We live in a Society where view of women and their roles is very distorted –
A)Feminist on one
side –The best man for the job is a woman / the Hedonist on the other side – Woman’s
place is for man’s gratification
B)She exist to be a Trophy on His Arm !!!/ pleasure
1)
Then
there is the Traditionalist – Woman belongs in
the Home – bearing Children & taking care of them/ Bear foot & Pregnant
C)What does God’s word say ? We know what Mrs.
America is supposed to look like / But what does Ms. Woman of God Look Like !!!
D) The world
distorts the role of women on all sides
1.) That is why it is so important we look at God's word as to what
a woman is to be - not to be!
The Problem w/ many women get sucked into this
trap of feeling like they need to find
fulfillment in some role! Wife /
Mom/ Career
A) They might start
w/ the career – Doesn’t fill it
B) They have been told one day
wife & mother - find fulfillment! /So girl
meets
guy - married - doesn't find fulfillment looking for!
C) Next? Answer Kids / still not there! Something lacking!
D) Problem is you will be disappointed - not find
fulfillment in any role!
1) You as a women need to find fulfillment &
contentment not
in a role
but in the one who made you!
E) That is where fulfillment and contentment comes
from living in a loving
relationship w/ living God!
Many women make the mistake of looking to their
husbands to meet all needs'…………………………………………………………………………
A)
Problem is hubby can't meet those needs
- hubby is going to fall short!
1.) Wife says - "I'm so frustrated w/my hubby - he just isn't
the man I hoped he would be " TRUE
B) Understand - no man will be! No man will
satisfy the need you feel deep inside/ Accept Jesus!'
1) Receive fulfillment from
Jesus. & you will Begin to bless
husband instead of burden him !
C) The key to finding fulfillment / the Key to being
the kind of wife God
calls you to be is in allowing Jesus to be at Home in your heart!
1) Allowing
Jesus to be the center of your life !
Early Church one of the problems that arose was that women were getting
saved when their husbands were not. / Same today
A) Peter
addressing those women in this section in a desire to
encourage
them in their home life
B) But What he writes can apply to any woman in any situation / married or not! Married
to a
Believer or an unbeliever
C) Peter lays
out some principles in this section illustrating how a
woman who is in
love w/ Jesus can make a real impact
1) on her Husband unsaved or
saved / but also on her sphere of
influence w/ kids , friends , neighbors / on the Job!
AS we
look at this passage I wants us to note 4 characteristics of a godly woman !
A) 1st
Characteristic is that a godly woman is seen in her
her
behavior . CHASTE CONDUCT!
V. 1,2
B) The word Chaste refers to Purity /
speaks of a conduct free from
carnality ! Free from compromise!
C) Paul uses
the same word in 2 Cor. 11: 2 speaking to the Church
he says For I have
betrothed you to one husband, that I may present you as a chaste virgin to
Christ.
Now in Titus 2:3
Paul uses the term in speaking of the Christian woman – Life marked by a
Reverent Behavior { two go together
A)
Reverent in behavior, speaks of a life that is marked by a conscious awareness of God. a life marked by a sense
of God’s presence
B)
It speaks of a woman who’s behavior reveals that she is very aware of the Fact
that GOD IS W/ HER
C)
To put it simply – Live a life where you Practice the Presence of God
1) Having a constant awareness of the NEARNESS OF GOD
Joseph
was one who Practiced the Presence of God – Kept from Sin with Potiphar's wife
{ Can’t do this sin against God } Easy to rationalize …
A)
Some people can be chameleons – they just adapt to the group that they are
around – Worldly – they act dress worldly / Christians – it is different
B)
But a woman who is reverent in her behavior is one who is going to be constantly
aware of God’s Presence with her
1)
She is not going to be shaped by her environment, but rather She is going to
shape her environment
C)
Her life is going to be marked by a Reverence for the Lord – a Healthy Fear of
the Lord – a Desire to honor God w/ her life
1)
Proverbs 1:7 The fear of the Lord is the Beginning of
Wisdom
D)
A woman who is walking in the fear of the Lord is going to be wise in her
behavior – because she is in tune with the Lord –
1)
She is seeking to please the Lord !!!!!
E) Prov 29:25 The fear of man brings a snare…………………….
1) Tripped up by being worried
about what others think -
The remarkable thing about fearing God is
that when you fear God you fear nothing else, whereas if you do not fear God
you fear everything else.
Oswald Chambers
A) David was Practicing the Presence of God
when He went out to meet Goliath – Sword & Spear – name of the God of
Israel
B)
He was aware of God’s Presence with him – resulting in a boldness to take on
the impossible
So The godly woman is one who's life is marked by a purity in her conduct, in her motives, & her Appearance { Chaste = Modesty
A) There
is So much pressure to conform to the
styles of the world – but are those styles modest – are they chaste – marked by
a purity
B) I have seen many women who were once in love w/
Jesus who
once had
vibrant walks w/ the Lord get sucked into a worldly lifestyle
1) It all started when they began to drop their
guard & lower their standard regarding being CHASTE
C) I don’t think anyone can
define for the rest of us – what is Modest or not
1) Question – would you feel comfortable wearing
that if Jesus was present in the room
D) So the Godly Woman is Chaste in her Conduct
2nd Principle Peter describes of the godly woman involves
her Priorities v.3,4
3 Do not let your adornment be merely outward;
arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel;
4 rather let it be the hidden person of the
heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is
very precious in the sight of God.
A.) The emphasis here
is on priority! Is your focus
going to be on inward beauty or outward beauty
B) Now Understand Peter is in no way advocating
neglecting yourself physically - not wearing make up or jewelry
1) Christian women can be attractive without being worldly!
C)
but a Christian woman should not think of her outer attire as “the source” of her genuine beauty!
1) Other words, be cautious of “artificial glamour”.
"Glamour is artificial and external true beauty
is real & internal. Glamour is something you can put on and take
off But true beauty is always present
Glamour is something that is
corruptible it decays & fades
True beauty is from the
heart & grows more wonderful as the years pass! Imperishable - incorruptible - can't taint it -
C) Your real beauty is going to be seen in the internal hidden
person - who
you
are on inside
So To the woman who wants to be
godly woman, wife - Peter says - give
greater attention to the inner person
A) Concentrate on beautifying the inner person/
hidden person of the heart!
B) The emphasis here is on priority! Is your focus going to be
on inward
beauty
or outward beauty
1) This can be a hard balance in our culture where
there is so much emphasis put on physical appearance!
C.) Most women know - that hubby might be around beautiful women
all day at office - insecure about coming
home to the totaled woman
1) As a result Many women get wrapped up in
following the input of the
world - to be overly concerned about appearance - externals
Ladies, how you “catch em”; is what you’ll need to “keep em”!
Catch
them w/your “body/hair/clothes”; you
better keep it under high maintenance!
A) Catch them w/your heart; you’ll
keep them w/your heart!
I
have seen college age girls who were average in their appearance physically - Yet attract a lot of attention
A)
Because people were attracted to Jesus in them. Didn’t know it - Something shined - they wanted!
B) Ladies
the Best compliment someone can give you is - they see Jesus in you - or
Christ-like spirit
C) Guys encourage your wife in this !!!!! And look in the mirror !!!
1) Denise
clean freak when 1st married ! / What I was attracted to
3rd thing we see here characteristics of the godly woman is
Self Control / that focus on her inner person affects her attitude/
A.) Resulting
in a gentle and quiet spirit! Which Peter says is precious in the sight of God!
B.) Now before you get the image in your mind of a wallflower or doormat -
let's
explain what these words mean!
C.) Word gentle is really meek - meekness
is not weakness - meekness
means power under control!
1.) It speaks of strength of character and strong
self control / of elegance and dignity
D.) Prov 31:25 - Virtuous wife "strength
and dignity are her clothing -
she smiles at the future!"
1.) She is inwardly clothed w/ strength of character
and confidence
Meekness is inner strength that comes from being
confident of who you are in Christ /
realizing that inner beauty is what counts the most !
A.) Inner strength that results in the
self-control of a person who is being led
by the
spirit by her emotions
B) Quiet refers to - not given to outburst of wrath - not
easily provoked
1) Again suggesting
the idea of self - control
C)
Again in Titus 2 Paul uses the word Discreet - Discreet means “self-controlled,
circumspect or careful.”
D)
It is really the opposite of being
governed by impulse or emotions
Proverbs 11:22 says this: “As a ring of
gold in a pig’s snout, so is a lovely woman who lacks discretion.” That’s a very picturesque proverb isn’t
it?
E) A ring of gold in a pig’s snout, is not
attractive AT ALL!!!
Well,
a lovely woman who lacks discretion is like that, the Scripture says
That
is Not to say that emotions IMPULSES don’t
play a factor in decisions and things we do, they always play a factor
to some extent.
A)
God made us w/ EMOTIONS – we are emotional people - But our emotions are not to
be the ruling forces in our lives.
B)
Emotions are really a bad way to determine actions or to make decisions,
because our emotions can fluctuate. Up & Down all
over the Place !!!
1) And we can be deceived by our emotions.
C) And we can feel strongly about something. And if we decide to act on it without really
thinking it through & praying it thru –
1)
We can end up in a situation where – we look back – why did I do that !
Circumstances
can also play on our emotions –
A) Look for open doors –
Jonah – had open door do opposite of what God wanted
B) In my life – I can’t –
depend on open doors – I have open doors all over the place – for ministry – {Big Church package } Speaking
1) I have to hear from the
Lord !!!! Sharp SHOOTERS
And
so he says that the wise woman is a discreet woman. Not moved or governed by Impulses – learns to pray & listen –
confirmation
A)
She is someone who is going to be making decisions that are led by the Spirit
and not her emotions & impulses
1)
whether you are talking about ministry / Shopping / Kids discipline
B) Which means that she is going to be a woman who
has an active prayer life – she has learned how to Pray as well as how to
listen
B.) The
godly wife is a woman of strong character & self control
1.)Which
is the Result of cultivating the inner garden!
C.) Ladies understand that it only takes a short time to doll up the
outside the
shell!
/ but
cultivating the inner person is a lifetime process!
Lastly - she is responsive - v.5,6 - Here Peter draws upon
the example of holy women of the past / who were in submission to their husbands!
A) focuses Sarah - ( Talked about last week )
B) Key phrase here - "Who trusted in God" - this reveals to us that they
were
responsive to God's will / heart and Word
C) Sarah obeyed -
lit. means paid close attention to -
Abraham called
him Lord because she trusted in the Lord!
1) She was submitted to the Lord which made it
easier for her to be submitted to her husband !!!!
The
mark of a godly wife or woman is that she is a doer of the Word, not just a
hearer!
A.) On the
average women are usually more interested in spiritual matters than men
B.)90% of books purchased on subject of marriage are
purchased by women
C.) But it
is sad to say that some women are avoiding the issue by learning what is right rather
than doing what is right
D.) A lot
Christian women know much more than they put into practice!
The Lord's instruction to the woman in pretty simple -
submit to your husbands, trust in Lord
A.) And - cultivate the inner person of the
heart! Allowing the Lord to grow you up
in Him { Empower you with HIS Spirit ……..
B.) Allowing Him to make you a godly wife - mother - allowing Him to
work in
you make impact around you
1.) If you do this - you are wise and you will be blessed!